You know you're a parent of toddlers part TWO

When you stumble on one child messing with the other child's meticulous toy set up, you find yourself panicking, frantically trying to set it right and muttering "no, no, no, he's going to be so mad!" under your breath.

When your children get the stomach flu, you reach out to catch the vomit with your bare hands.

The morning bathroom routine that used to take 45 minutes has been whittled down to 12. Brushing your hair and teeth is now considered your "routine". Bonus points for deodorant with a pretty scent. Lose points for using Daddy's Old Spice because yours never made it to the shopping list.

Every surface of your house is now fair game for toys and fingerprints. This includes the dining room table, bathroom sink, and hallways. The stairs will be a hard battle to win, but stick to your guns. If you have metal framing and magnetic toys, even the walls are fair game. (See photo)

In addition to the previously mentioned urine aroma, you'll likely have crumbs and the occasional aroma of spoiled milk. This will occur regardless of how strict your food-doesn't-leave-the-kitchen policy is.

When greeting your child in the morning, after a nap, or a long play date, you subtly feel the seat and crotch of their pants for leaky diaper wetness.

You carefully coordinate meal and nap details in the mere hopes of obtaining 5 solo minutes in the shower. Despite careful planning, your dogs lose their sh*t as you are in a state of undress and mere seconds from turning on the water, waking one baby and infuriating the other. You may or may not have fantasies about mute dogs, sound proof bedrooms and hiring a nanny for half an hour a day.